C,

A lot has happened over the past week. I haven’t needed to post it here because I’ve been able to talk to you directly. Those last two weeks, I thought I would lose you. I was an inch from walking away. Truly. But I needed it in a funny way. I tend to put women on a pedestal and during those two weeks I couldn’t put you on a pedestal. You’re far too broken and messy. I held on to the memories of the girl I knew before all that s***, the girl who said she wasn’t going to dip. And at the last moment, when I thought I was done, you showed me just enough of yourself to keep me going on more day.

These past few days, really being close to you and spending so much time with you has