I’ve always been very low maintenance but I’m starting to wonder if I shouldn’t be. I know I could be beautiful, if I wore makeup and spent more money/time on my hair. People tell me I’m pretty but I see so many prettier than me. I consider myself average looking.
Now that I’m in love, I want to keep him forever. I don’t have to be good enough for myself, I have to compete with every other woman. Plus, I want to be taken more seriously at work. But my life would change. No more playing in the rain, laughing until I cry, running and biking everywhere, and such… Maybe that’s part of growing up. Maybe I need to suck it up.
I mean no offense to women who do the things I dread, you have every right to be yourself and my interests aren’t superior to yours. I’m just sad because I’m starting to feel like I don’t have a choice anymore. I’ve always been the outcast with her head in the clouds. I didn’t want to come down.