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a random feeling
7 years
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i met this guy in one of my classes and we did become good friends! i didn’t like him and he didn’t like me and it was good. This annoying girl in that class one day started shipping us and both of us were like: uhh hun no. but, then i felt like i started catching feelings and i knew he wasn’t. my friend and i suspected he liked my other friend and we just found out for sure around three weeks ago. before that, i was still friends with him and wasn’t sure if he felt the same about me. what was confusing though was that i did ship him and my friend pretty hard? so i wasn’t sure if i still liked him or was trying to get him with my other friend. a bunch of drama went down and it brought me and him closer together but i can’t tell if i still want something out of this. i don’t ship my friend and him anymore, but that’s because of weird stuff that happened that wasn’t related to this. i still don’t know what’s happening, but i’m still trying to be friends.

New Confession

there was a time I saw what looked like CSAM, so I looked away immediately. then I thought “was that really CSAM or did I misjudge it”, looked back, verified that it was pretty likely to be CSAM and then immediately looked away again, that time for good. then I reported it.

there was a time I got a popup ad advertising “teen p***”: fearing that it might’ve been CSAM, I closed it, but then had the same thought as above and reopened it so I could be sure before I report it, which I did. I don’t know if those actors were actually 18+ or not, though it seems likely they were.

there was a time that, on my Google image search results, there was a “teen p***” thumbnail. I looked away, but then added a word to the search and scrolled down the results again, knowing that the thumbnail might’ve been there. it was, and I saw it again. I don’t know if those actors were actually 18+ or not, though it seems likely they were. I reported that too, but I was panicking about something else at the time and allowed it to distract me from my moral duty, so it took me a day or two iirc.

have I done moral wrong? have I done harm? and is it redeemable?

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