People keep telling me what I *need* to be. I need to be more confident. I need to be more open. I need to be more sympathetic. I need to believe in myself. I need to be more outgoing.

Need. Need. Need.

Don’t the understand that I KNOW? I know what I need to be, but it’s not a switch I can turn on and off. I can’t just suddenly be more confident in myself and my abilities. I can’t just suddenly feel sad about something that happens to someone. I can’t just suddenly pour my heart out to someone without having faith that they won’t use things against me.

What I *need* is to have people who understand me, and don’t force me to be something I’m not. I know all the things I need to be. I do. And I am doing my absolute best to get there, but it’s hard. And it’s going to take time. All I’m asking for is a little patience. My brain understands all the things I *need* to do. And maybe one day I’ll get there. But you telling me all the things I need to do just makes me angry. And tired. So, so tired.