I just wish I hadn’t taken you back into my life at that point when I had a CHOICE. I could have saved myself so many negative emotions. And I KNEW it was a bad idea at the time. I just couldn’t say no, you were in so much need. At least I know I’m not in love with you. Love feels so much better than what we had. I just need to move on from this sticky obsession with the past. It’s just so much easier said than done. I am mentally weak in this area.
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Fuckin brawds man. You always had a choice.
With me, it made me bitter and it was like “What the fuck….” to say the least. I used get so depressed right after it ended thinking “oh my fucking god, I cant believe I said that shit to her?!?.. she is NEVER coming back to me… holy shit! Anybody who cares about her should want to kill me” it was that bad. I don’t ever think I was such a vile piece of shit with my language. It was horrible. Never again though. I learned my lesson there. It’s there or it is t and that’s just it. There a no “trying” or anything, as soon as I get a vibe, it’s there or it isn’t. Zero patience.
You’re right I did always have a choice. It just didn’t feel like it.