Torn in bits and pieces..
When I start to gather myself up to talk to or about him, I find myself puzzled..
Is he heaven or hell!!
Is he war or peace!!
Is he a shelter or a home!!
Well, He’s just one high tough mountain..
Where with each step, I just hurt myself more..
Hoping that I will find shelter in this mountain just made me a refugee welcomed for a few days,
I keep waiting for him to make any reaction to calm my storm but he turns into a hurricane..
Though, the excitement of the journey makes me want to climb higher.
And Not knowing where I will end up terrifies me, I want to be somebody to him but I know I am just a clingy rock between hard ones..
I knew the meaning of how your heart pounds in your chest when you think about someone special to you, I knew how hard it is to not know what place do you occupy in their lives, I knew what mind distortion is when he’s in everything, every thought and every detail and you can’t get your things done because of this..
Without any intentions, You catch yourself looking at him, not only looking at but looking through and in..
He’s a very tough riddle that I can’t even understand, but I am trying with all my will and power as he taught me to believe in myself before.
I can’t neglect the fact that he does stupid things, very stupid ones actually..
and he is very stubborn, and because I am stubborn too, I just want to punch him in the face.. but I always draw back and let him do what he wants..
If I just can tell him how I hate and love him at the same time,
how I wish to know if he’s sticking around or passing through!!
I can’t tell his intentions neither do mine.
But my ice melts the second I see these..
His childish spontaneous smile and excitement, his eyes when he speaks about the things he love, his way of thinking that is beyond amazing, his fatherly acts, his noble manners,
His everything,
But me, I am everything and it’s opposite,
I am just a chaos work of art ,

and He’s a ‘masterpiece’..