I’m such a bad person, I lost a friend that I loved so much because of my attitude, I really want him back but I can’t, it’s over. He’s not perfect and he did stuff that made me mad at times, but I didn’t want to lose him, he was the ONLY one who knew the real me, who was always there for me, and I somehow managed to f*** things up because I’m that dumb. I f****** hate myself even more everytime I remember him. I lost him because of some stupid people he was the one who deserved the attention and not them. I know that he won’t read this but in any chance I want to feel like I’m talking to him directly so : I’m really really sorry, you loved me purely, you were there for me, you took a good care of me. And I loved you and I still love you, and you know how much of a mess I am, and I push people away and I told you about this and it’s out of my hands, I can’t help it, but I’m trying to be a better person, I’m forcing myself to become more social, to be positive, so that maybe if you come back I’ll be the best version of me and treat you better, I never wanted you away. I’m really sorry