My partner told me he was a dom before we got together, but he never leads or make any decisions. He makes me f****** do it all. We’re open and he has rules about who he’ll approve of. Someone I got attached to broke one of those rules, so I didn’t pursue him, but then a guy that broke almost every rule came along, and (looking back) was being obviously manipulative and pressuring us into saying yes, and managed to get my partner to actually say yes. I was shocked. I wanted nothing to do with this guy because I thought something was wrong, but I have bad anxiety so I brushed it off and trusted my partner’s judgement, because he had placed such strict rules on who we would allow and he’s a better judge of character than me. It was the only bad experience I’ve ever had with anyone in that capacity. I regret saying no to the person I actually cared about, but my partner was already accusing me of cheating when I was doing delivery runs after work, and he started hurting me. I also didn’t want to hurt him or have my own heart broken because I was already obsessed with him, and I don’t know how casual he wanted to be. I don’t know if he’d be okay with me being queer either. He’s the only person I think I can really trust, but I can’t talk to him because I’m stupid and paranoid and lost the number, and can’t find any current media to contact him.