i wish my dad could see just how much hes put me through and how its done me in. its agonizing having to sit there and watch him and my stepmother completely disregard me and my feelings about things, either trying to push me into scenarios im uncomfortable with or pushing me away from something i feel as if is important to me. this time it was them keeping me from seeing my deceased grandmother for the last time, even if she is just ashes now. they plan on taking a trip to scotland to dump her out there but instead of having people there who knew her (her own grandson for starters), they decided to bring along my stepmom’s family who didn’t have any connections to her whatsoever. i never got to see her when they were wheeling her out of her house, i never got to pick out what i wanted to keep from her place, we had no funeral because theyre so stingy with their money, and now i wont be able to see the last of her for good this time. i had some of the best memories with her and i was at her house for a good chunk of my life, not because i had to, but because i simply wanted to be with her. i didnt get to say bye to her when she was alive, and now i wont be able to in death. thats a bit cruel, no? and he has the audacity to wonder why i dont want to go to his house.
