I’m tired of fighting my own brain. I always have to shove back the urge to just up and off myself but I know it’s my own brain turning against me. I’m always fighting, whether it’s fighting to keep someone in my life who may not even like me anymore; or fighting to keep focused, fighting to do daily tasks, fighting to just…get out of bed every morning.
It’s getting harder and harder and there’s nobody I can confide in about it without hurting someone else, so here I post anonymously hoping if I just vent, it will go away. But it won’t, it never goes away, it’s only temporary and maybe I’m just prolonging the inevitable.
Maybe I’ll end up like my parents, drowning myself in temporary relief before I either dive off the deep end or just hide myself from society just barely scrapping by.
I’m just…tired.
