if i let you back into my life again, don't abuse it. leave me out of it. if it never was about what I thought, fine. but it wasn't whatever you wanted

3 years

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if i let you back into my life again, don’t abuse it. leave me out of it. if it never was about what I thought, fine. but it wasn’t whatever you wanted the situation to be. It wasn’t about you no matter how much you projected and wanted to force it to be. spoken about and direct harassment has a big line in the middle. I’ve never seen someone want to play the victim so bad, so often. can even prove you’ve been like this to at least 3 different sets of people. they don’t trust you. seemingly for who you are. something you can’t change, so you think. but they don’t like you not because you haven’t changed sweetie. they don’t like you anymore because they realized all you do is change. you have a mask for everyone you meet. that’s what eats you about us. I know how faceless you really are. that’s not someone I’m willing to meet anymore. goodbye

New Confession

I hate you and resent you, you never listen and only hear what you wanna hear. You like me but its only conditional and when its convenient for you. You treat me like trash just like everyone else has and walking on eggshells. Any little mistake I make, your awful to me, you’re easily possessive , controlling and get easily jealous if i so much smile at someone yet its okay for you to have friends. You don’t want me to talk to anyone else yet you push me when I want to have a conversation with you. You only halfway listen, and you wonder why I completely shut down and dead inside. I rather live and die alone than feel more alone & isolated around everyone who’ve treated me like a freak. You get mad that I don’t want to be near you yet you’ve mocked me when I was really upset and hurt. I feel trapped and stuck. Im waiting to die, I hate this non-ending cycle pathetic excuse of this life im living. I can’t even escape in my own thoughts, if a god or any other being exists and is listening, please take me away already , why do you let me live ?

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