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a pain
4 years
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In 2017, I got engaged and in 2018 I got married to a guy and it was arranged. Now I’m living a life with him and our kid. I’m thankful to God because family is good. We both adjusting each other so well.
Flash back, 2011, I fell in love with a guy. I’ve never ever felt such love in my ever life, even now. I was forced to leave him by my family, particularly my brother, he threatened me that he will suicide if I marry this guy also my dad eventually become against of this marriage. I tried my best. I failed. I’m not a type of girl that leave my parents and cheat them and marry a guy. I tried to get them accept him, but failed and accepted my fate.
Back to the present. Now I have a kid, husband who is genius but very introvert. I respect him and I’ve never cheated him and will never. But sometimes, mm..no, everyday I think of my past and I’ll be in deep pain as it hurts too much.
In Dec 2022, my ex got married. He is happy. I know him, he is very genuine guy, who is very close to Jesus. His girl is the luckiest girl in the world, I’ll say. Today it will be 11 years he said he loved me, I’m going to forget him forever. If he appears into my mind, I’ll deviate my mind.
I wanted to confess my feelings to someone and I searched in web for anonymous confessions. I felt this is an apt place.
I loved you, I couldn’t forget you and I missed you a lot. Now I’ll never…
I’m going to focus on my life, my husband and my precious kid. Bye

New Confession

I’m a teen. How can I do it* with no pain. It’s hard for me to access to the stuff. (It=death) I’m exhausted. My family hates me. My friends are always stepping on me. I’m very fat and very ugly. I do sh. A need a cheap, not painful and accessible way. I need a hug. I used to let myself get groomed by older men. I loved the attention but I felt dirty. I blocked anyone if they ever asked for nudes. My grades are horrible. I work hard. I swear I do. But I’m so stupid. I already tried to do it* several times. It always failed and they were very painful. I can’t access to any pill. I’m probably mentally ill but no one will notice that because no one cares. I’m desperate find a way. My only escape from reality is eating. But now I’m f****** obese, ugly and getting bullied. No men will ever even like me. No one loves me as a friend despite how much I put effort in the friendship. For the last time. I’m begging you for a way out. The world is not made for me

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Related Confessions

I’m a teen. How can I do it* with no pain. It’s hard for me to access to the stuff. (It=death) I’m exhausted. My family hates me. My friends are always stepping on me. I’m very fat and very ugly. I do sh. A need a cheap, not painful and accessible way. I need a hug. I used to let myself get groomed by older men. I loved the attention but I felt dirty. I blocked anyone if they ever asked for nudes. My grades are horrible. I work hard. I swear I do. But I’m so stupid. I already tried to do it* several times. It always failed and they were very painful. I can’t access to any pill. I’m probably mentally ill but no one will notice that because no one cares. I’m desperate find a way. My only escape from reality is eating. But now I’m f****** obese, ugly and getting bullied. No men will ever even like me. No one loves me as a friend despite how much I put effort in the friendship. For the last time. I’m begging you for a way out. The world is not made for me

3 Views