All this time i thought i had no chance. I thought many things have been decided long before i had any influence on the outcome. I had given up… But now after a certain event i decided to revisit some events and situations and i found something completely strange and scary, hope. There is hope that things can be different, that’s something that i havent thought in years. Two scenarios ahead , hope is wrong and i am right all along for accepting my situation and being hurt for the false hope, second scenario, it turns out to be true and i have been wasting all these years in misery without any good reason, because i was too afraid to try. Although i did try certain times. You would think that hope makes you feel full, but i feel completely empty. It’s annoying having to feel about the things you have to face, and not just face them unaffected of emotions.