5 years
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My siblings are evil demonic creatures of the matrix and the i***** demon sent them back into my life I’m the youngest and they are really creepy and probably a pedophiles because they have p******** vibes I want to escape these evil demon creatures there’s a demon thats pushing 30 and its so creepy and raggedy I want out of this evil demon house every good soul knows that the narcissistic b**** golden child is an evil i***** demon now and it has flying monkey around its so creepy and a predator please help when I was 16 it preyed on a young boy these DEMONS are pedophiles probably and I want to leave they are nasty narcissistic abusers who would bait me to fight them so that my dad would grab my t****** back in 2016 I think they want to fight me and provoke me into fighting them so that they can touch up on me via fighting me it’s almost their way of f****** me without getting caught they lie and the gaslight the hell out of me especially my narcissistic older siblings

New Confession

i injected ketamine into my right deltoid and realized i had no water to drink. by the time i was in the kitchen i was dissociated as hell trying to remind myself im a person in a kitchen trying to get ice cubes and filtered water into my tumbler

it hit much much harder than it did when i tried it in my vastus lateralis. i injected nearly 80mg which is over 1mg/kg for me. im still feeling it a little. apparently the comedown is longer than IV but way less than IN. its 3am now and i have some powder and some sterile solution left in the vial to inject into my vein. ive been trying to get the out of body ketamine experience during my trips but still havent gotten there during my last few for a while now even with needles involved. i was a little closer tonight though, without overwhelming my system or anesthetizing myself

i usually take it once every few months or so. i take medication with a needle every week so im used to them but not used to plunging the bigger thicker ones down deep into my muscle like that. the painful pressure feeling is hard to get used to. and the deep ache that lingers for a few days. i got a little sweaty and lightheaded seeing and feeling an inch of stainless steel sink into my body. there’s that animal instinct part of me that doesn’t want to shove metal into myself and cringes at what im doing but another part too that finds fascination in the sensation and resistance to the needle in the different layers of tissue.

i’ve found it fun and interesting to experiment with all the ways of administering this drug and learning more about my body along the way. exactly where the arteries run down my arms or where major nerves might be hiding.

i dont really have something to finish this off with. it was fun, painful, and interesting. the comedown for IM seems to be 2-3 hours long so far. i stayed up very late to do this. i may augment with nitrous next time.

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