I started my first day right now and I finished my first class I already feel stressed. I hate this I hate today I hate yesterday I hate school I hate people I hate going out I hate talking to others. There’s so much s*** that happens to me one day I’m okay and I’m going strong and the next my mood is completely different and I hate it everyday is different and not even in a good way. I don’t wanna try at anything. This month is suicide prevention month. Obviously i posted on my private story letting people know I’m here. I talk to everyone because I’ve felt things myself and I genuinely know how it is but no one seems to care. It’s fine but now I don’t speak to anyone. I log out of my socials and check it a few times but I find it absolutely pointless. I just don’t have anyone and some days I’d like someone to care but others I hate everything and everyone around me i can’t stand it no matter who they are I don’t wanna talk to them. I’m so close to shutting my computer and going back to bed because I’m honestly struggling right now. I cant eat I keep trying and i gag. I tried my favorite food Mac and cheese and I couldn’t finish that. I’m just in bed all the time crying, angry, or sad. It’s my schedule. I just want a hug I just wanna be held. I don’t wanna listen to music anymore and sit here alone I just want a hug I just want someone to care and love me just a little bit
