Every time I read a book, watch a movie or a TV show, or even day dream, I get sucked into a whole new world. I experienced stronger emotions there then anywhere else. But when I stop I feel like reality crashes down on my head. I remember who I am, how I feel where I am and everything that I’ve done and it’s disappointing. I consume characters who are unafraid to say who they are. But I am afraid of even writing down in an anonymous note who I am. I am a lesbian. I feel gross. I feel angry. I feel sad. I feel scared. I feel lonely. I feel frustrated. I feel shameful. Shame is a funny thing. I am ashamed of something I can’t control. Something I didn’t chose. Something I couldn’t have possibly caused. Seems silly right? I am afraid to face the world as who I really am. But I am afraid to keep living this lie. Most of all I’m afraid the first fear will win.