The cycle of mental illness is continuing in my family.
I don’t know what to do, there is no reasoning with any of them, even when you think you can try.
It’s really just useless because they are all stuck i their own selfish mindsets
“Me against the world! Everyone s***! I have to do everything alone! Feel sorry for me s***!”
I really can’t understand people who don’t have an empathetic bone in their body
and then even when they do things get twisted, people perceive things so reversed sometimes.
I just wish my sister would become more stable and show some kind of humility but she is seriously going through an even worse mental breakdown than I have ever seen her.
She was always erratic and always very head strong but I know that the insanity of our Mother is part of her biggest problem and it will never be resolved probably not even until after my parents are both long gone.
In her defense they tortured and abused us, forced us into a cult, kicked her out when she got pregnant as a teenager.
I myself have been very angry for a long time, and trying to deal with the issues that are so complicated within family matters gives me such a headache. I’ve concluded that it’s not worth my time to focus on any of this s*** anymore.
I am worried about my sister who posts pictures on instagram of her self harm and recently posted a picture of her black eye with the caption reading that she had just overdosed and all this other s*** for strangers to see.
She must be going through a really difficult time if this is what she has resorted to for attention… idk.
We haven’t talked in over a year after I told her that if she hates her life so much she should’ve aborted her kid, she has four now, with three different men.
She’s constantly complaining, she is greedy and humiliating everything blew up
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EDIT:
The cycle of mental illness is continuing in my family.
I don’t know what to do, there is no reasoning with any of them, even when you think you can try.
It’s really just useless because they are all stuck in their own selfish mindsets
“Me against the world! Everyone sucks! I have to do everything alone! Feel sorry for me shit!”
I really can’t understand people who don’t have an empathetic bone in their body
and then even when they do show empathy, things get twisted, people perceive things so reversed sometimes.
I just wish my sister would become more stable and show some kind of humility but she is seriously going through an even worse mental breakdown than ever before.
She was always erratic and always very head strong but I know that the insanity of our Mother is part of her biggest problem and it will never be resolved probably not even until after my parents are both long gone.
In her defense they tortured and abused us, forced us into a cult, kicked her out when she got pregnant as a teenager.
I myself have been very angry for a long time, and trying to deal with these issues that are so complicated within family matters and gives me such a headache. I’ve concluded that it’s not worth my time to focus on any of this shit anymore.
But I am worried about my sister, who posts pictures on instagram of her self harm and recently posted a picture of her with a black eye with the caption reading that she had just overdosed and all this other shit for strangers to see.
She must be going through a really difficult time if this is what she has resorted to for attention… idk.
We haven’t talked in over a year after I told her that if she hates her life so much she should’ve aborted her kid, she has four now, with three different men. Which I know was fucked up but she was acting crazy and regularly talked to me about the other abortions she did have and I guess I thought that would put her in her place but It was hateful and I said it out of anger. I was so tired of her ungratefulness and greed.
Everything blew up over Christmas 2018 when all of my siblings and their kids came home and we all had to face our own hatred for each other.
I am the youngest of five, our Mother raised us to hate ourselves, she rude to strangers, and condoned and participated in the abuse that our father subjected us to.
In my mother’s defense she was also abused as a child and molested and grew up in group homes so she’s basically just hanging on to anything that she can – her cult religion – my abusive father-
But I get it ok we had shit but Other people have shit too The Whole WORLD is full of SHIT.
Be grateful for the life you have.
Sure you didn’t ask for all of the problems that you were dealt but you and you alone are responsible for your own destiny so fuck everyone else who screwed you.
Be better than them. Stand up for something better than them, help other people who didn’t have the opportunity to reach the clarity and understanding that you have.
Be grateful that you’re not still there, facing the abuse.
There are so many issues to deal with in the world and I personally have no time for someone who’s just going to sulk and feel sorry for themself. It’s bullshit.
I am fed up with the lies and twisted words and selfishness.
Can we all just not be quiet and content in our own corner of the world????
I wish I wasn’t even the kind of person who would come on here to write this all out because like I said it doesn’t matter
I want to give back to the world and to the earth and make it a better place before I leave.
I am so uninterested in greed and material shit
I wish I could hit the reset button
And I wish we didn’t exist sometimes because this is so ridiculous.
but for now all I can do is accept my shortcomings and try to do better and hope that the people around me will see that and come together.
I recently reached out to my sister on instagram and kind of wrote all of this stuff out for her to read, I hope that she doesn’t just see it as some selfish hail mary because it’s not, i just want her to know that I understand everything I did wrong and not only do I wish her the best but hope that she can move on too because that is what I am trying to do.
But The internet is so toxic too , I hate this space.
I hate what this toxic society has turned people into.
I know this is all so disorganized but there’s a lot going on here.
It’s hard to change things when permanent damage has been done.
: (
I want my family to be normal but it’s kind of a far fetched dream when we never have been