I am absolutely not in love with my best friend (let’s call her J), I know how toxic we could be for each other if we ever got into a relationship. She has a boyfriend, who is one of the best, and kindest men I know, yet I can’t stop imagining the different ways I’d f*** J.
I can’t stop staring at her, she keeps popping up in my dreams.
I just want to make her body mine, to make her feel such intense things that she would just lay in front of me for a few minutes, incapable of standing up (not that I know how to do that, but it’s what I wish for).
And it got to the point where I don’t even care if she’s in a relationship, even though I’m all about loyalty and I feel really bad bad when someone gets cheated.
And the thing is that I’m really good friends with her bf, like he’s the type of friend with whom you don’t see the time go by.
But still, J is the woman I physicaly desire more than any other.
It’s been over two months now that I feel that way, and I feel awful, and h****, and desperate, and ashamed, and lonely, and h****, and h**** and h****!

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