I did something horrible a few years ago. Now the guilt is killing me and I think I need to confess or kill myself. The problem..doing either will completely destroy my family and loved ones. I cant change the past..and I wonder should I suffer this alone..or destroy my whole family to ease my own pain. its one of those things…morally should definitely be told..but the aftermath makes you question if it was the best decision to air this dirty secret. I am so confused, ashamed, hurt and lonely. Its completely my fault..and I walk around everyday knowing I am a p************ living on borrowed time.
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Talk to me. What did you do? All humans make mistakes; I made a huge one and felt just like you not too many years ago. I’ll talk to you for as long as you want.
Killing yourself won’t change anything. What was it about? You already have two people here willing to listen. We can help
Bullshit. Spit it out or shut the fuck up. Can’t be any worse than the child fuckin animal rapin confessions on here. Grow some nuts and quit whining
I violated the “trust”… of a close young family member. Not like most things for hear about on the news.. but enough for me to lose everything. The family member was 12 or 13 at the time. I don’t remember feeling any pleasure.. only fear.. but did it anyway. The person knows and decided not to tell.. and doesn’t want me to tell. Even said they still love me.. but I can never forgive myself. I have never pressured this person in any way and have offered to tell several times if they wanted me too. That monster.. is so far from the person I am and have worked to become.. that I feel dead already. Just typing this made me puke. I know what kind response I deserve.. and it scares me to death. I don’t have the ball’s to say exactly what happened, I will say it was not rape, penetration of any kind, or skin contact but it almost doesn’t matter once the line is crossed .. it’s crossed.
First of all, thank you for telling me what was bothering you. You are very brave- it is most difficult to adnit one’s mistakes to anyone. I wish I could have wrapped you in my arms as you told. It was a one time mistake, the person you did it against does not want you to tell, still loves you and has apparently moved on.
The best thing you could do is not tell anyone- do not embarass or betrqay the trust of the young person who wants no one else to know and keep your family intact. Now, you need to learn to forgive yourself. If the young person forgives you, learn to let it go. It is more easy said than done, I know from personal experience, but it becomes easier with time. The two best predicators that you will never do it again are how badly you feel over this indiscretion and it only happened once. Just make a promise to yourself to never do it again.
You are a great person and have a lot to offer this world. You are worthy of love and happiness. You are worthy to live your life to the fullest. Wishing you all the best…and please love yourself. ❤
Whoever you are..thank you so so very much for your kind words. They mean more than you could possibly understand.