I’m a 14 year old trans guy. I often watch gay p*** and rub myself later thinking about. Sometimes I even finger myself. Not only that but sometimes I watch trans men p***. I genuinely have gender dysphoria and stuff too so that makes me feel worse. It’s like I’m a trans guy and also fetishising trans men. I try to stop myself but I can’t. I feel disgusting.
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ok, look I don’t really give advice on this sort of thing but… it may be hard but getting rid of it bit by bit would be easier. If not you should accept it, after all nobody’s perfect.
I have tried to accept it. I’ve came to the conclusion that it’s just wrong.
it is, I never said it was right. but most people in the world has this sort of problem.
porn is brainwashy
You’re probably right.
I know it’s a cliche but the first (and often hardest) step is realizing there’s nothing wrong with having a non-straight non-cis sexual and gender identity, and that you’re not broken.
Gender dysphoria is real, emotionally exhausting and completely okay to have while you work this all out. You’re allowed to feel the way you do and there’s nothing disgusting about it and there’s nothing disgusting about you for feeling that way.
The “porn is brainwashy” comment is actually kind of on point, so do beware of the fact that it can shape your feelings in ways you may not always want it to. But often the things we fetishize are related to our own life experiences, and maybe yours is just the result of the feelings you’ve had about your own gender identity.
If those people successfully and confidently showing themselves off in porn give you a rush, and they tap into feelings of desire of what you want for yourself, it’s no surprise that you enjoy watching them. With that kind of emotional response, throw in a bit of “taboo” about it too (because it’s porn), and of course you’re gonna find it arousing.
The good news is you can get to a point where you’re happy and at peace with yourself and all that disgust’s gone.
There’s a fair chance you may need to think about professional help for the dysphoria, and to decide whether you go down the gender confirmation route. But there are thousands of people out there whose whole lives are dedicated to helping people on their journeys with their gender and sexual identities. You’re entitled to be different and be happy about it. If you need someone to talk to and you’re in the US or Canada, check out translifeline dot org for their helpline number. Good luck!