I was 24. We texted every day for months. She told me that I reminded her of Chandler from Friends. She liked that. She asked ME out. I felt like a guy she could love. I wanted to text her the minute I got home. But I waited for 3 days because my dad (who hasn’t had a woman since my mom) told me not to look desperate. So for 3 days, she texted me asking what she did wrong and I ignored her. On day 3 I felt so bad that I lied and said that I was sick and didn’t look at my phone. I asked her out but she said she was busy. I waited a week before asking her out again. She said that she’d rather be friends but we never spoke again.

She got married a few years ago to a mutual friend. He is kind of like me, a funny guy. Today I found out that they had a baby boy and bought a house together.

If alternate universes exist, there is one where I text her back and I get the girl. This universe is the one where I fucked up and can’t stop thinking about the girl I dated once 8 years ago. I fantasise about a glitch in the matrix where I get to wake up and be in that other universe; the one where I get the girl.