I want to be fucked by my uncle’s friend. He’s not handsome AT ALL. Sickly pale, he’s a total creep. Ofc he’s not married, no girlfriend. I assume he just pays escorts. God, if he only knew how much I want to have s** with him, s*** his c***, and let him come on my face. But I CANNOT tell him. My friends would be SHOCKED, tell me I am crazy and so on. I am too f****** gorgeous for him, definitely out of his league. And that’s the f****** point. Having s** with him would make me feel dirty, tainted, raped and the mere idea makes me h**** AF. Letting him touch me, kiss me would make me utterly DISGUSTED. But it is this disgust that makes me lust after him and I feel insane because I know that’s not normal and it’s SICK.
Gosh, during this quarantine I’ve dreamed of going to his house, let him tie me up and then beg him to f*** me mercilessly. I touch myself thinking about him, his hands caressing my skin, his lips on my n******. God, I’m definitely sick and obsessed. And makes no f****** sense. How can I feel at same time repulsed and attracted by him?
Also, I have a bf. He’s caring and hot, s** with him it’s just fine. But I don’t love him. It’s just for his looks. Everyone expects a girl like me to be with someone as handsome as he is.
I’m a such a hypocrite but I cannot help myself.
