To me s** is like taking a dump. The urge builds up and you take a dump and all is well in the world. The s** urge builds up and you get fucked and all is well with the world.

Otherwise I really don’t want anything to do with the guy. I am closeted, platonically in love with a coworker, I sweat when she sits beside me, I stammer when she says hello, I am not in her league, not even close. She is my boss and I love her to death. My pillow is always wet with tears, my bed is always unmade from playing with myself dreaming of being with her. One kiss and I will never f*** another guy, I promise.