I wish I was good-looking, so good looking that people would stop at parties and restaurants just to look me up and down and maybe someone might want to take me to bed. I am a nothing as far as looks even though I work out and dress well. I might as well not exist. Then people hear and see me play and sing and they are like “Holy f****** s***, you should be on ‘America’s Got Talent.’” (I have already sent them a video.) I am a ball of motherfuckin’ fire, you just maybe can’t tell when I’m on the street or in public because I don’t have tats or a f****** beard or anything that screams “LOOK AT ME, I’M SPECIAL!!!” My worth isn’t in my looks.

It just s**** tonight being at a Christmas party and about 10 different people looked at me and looked away. F*** you too, you soulless, boring, brain dead academic and your dopey kids. I left the party and what a relief.