8 years
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Whethew it’s acadecmics ow athwetics,
i’ww admit i’m pwetty hopewess
but when it comes to
my feewings fow you,
the cwass pwez, i’m suwe i am fiwst!
now i made up my mind to
wwite you a wove wettew of 7100 wowds
but the onwy pwobwem is,
i’m too scawed to give it to you!

hey, what awe you doing ovew thewe?
hey, if thewe’s something to say…
huwwy and spit it out!

so, um, hey um, what was it?
today’s a wovewy day,
wouwdn’t you agwee?
it makes me happy that
it’s so peacefuw awound~ hewe

is thewe a weason that
you’we shaking wike this?
and fuwthewmowe, what
awe you hiding fwom me?
hand it ovew, wight now!
(nooooo!)

i am suwe that you can feew
my auwa of chawismatic gweatness
and of couwse, my neck-tie is
baybewwy and custom-made

awe you suwe that’s what it’s cawwed?
i nevew even heawd of such a bwand name.
and since you’we hewe in the cwasswoom,
pwease take that wose out of youw mouth!

hey, do you have pwans on sunday?

weww, i have wessons pwanned…

maybe some othew time!

oh~ my dawwing kitten
awe you intimidated by pewfection?
it’s not my fauwt that the
othew giwws awe aww jeawous~

if i may ask, how did
you get that confidence?
i am a bit envious, honestwy
…We shouwd get going now

my chiwdhood fwiend ovew thewe
is just a dociwe wittwe wamb
may i have some pwivacy
with this wovewy miss?

i cannot wet this happen,
i’ve got to ovewcome my feaws!
cwass pwesident, pwease this
wettew – pwease wead it!
ahh~~!!

“evewy time the gentwe bweeze
catches you haiw and
sways the siwken wocks
i can feew my heawt
beating and jumping out of my chest”

so youw wwiting’s not
as bad as i thought
but she is obviouswy enamouwed with me
pwease make youw choice,
my deaw

weww, i was not expecting this
and as fow my decision,
oh, i don’t know
though thewe is one thing that
i have been thinking about

it’s aww the siwwy days
wike this one wight now
that i hope wiww nevew come to an end.
and, weww…
oh nevewmind!

New Confession

ALIEN TRANSFORMERS ARE REAL!

The All-Spark was the cube that gave life to the first Dynasty of Primes and the Transformer race to work under the Primes. All the Primes died out under the Fallen Prime (who had his little episode in Transformers 2). Many years later, the Transformers discover the remains of the Fallen Prime, and the Fallen somehow influences Megatron into turning to the dark side. Thus, the Autobot vs. Decepticon war.

It was known that the Primes could move back and forth in time, which is a product of the All-Spark and Sentinel Prime’s Space-Bridge (which makes an appearance in Transformers 3). Well, I propose that humans created the All-Spark somewhere in the future, and at some point, Cybertron got teleported several millenia into the past. The All-Spark itself got teleported back to Earth several million years in the past, where it lay for a long time until Megatron found it in Transformers 1. The prequel establishes that the Transformers had been looking for the All-Spark for millenia, so here’s the timeline we have relative to present Earth day:

4 Million Years in the Past: The All-Spark and Cybertron get teleported to the past. The All-Spark lands on Earth, and all the Transformers begin looking for it.

Some Point in the Past: Megatron finds the All-Spark but gets frozen in the ice

Some Point in the Past: In Transformers 2 it was established that Autobots had been hiding on Earth for a while, probably just not knowing where the All-Spark was but waiting to find out?

Present Day Earth: Events of Transformers 1 unfold when Decepticons land on Earth and Blackout attacks the military base in Qatar. Cue the events of Transformers 2 and 3.

Future: At some point in the future, humans had advanced far enough to create the All-Spark to give life to their mechanical creations.

A human-made All-Spark would make sense because the All-Spark had “unknown origins” anyway, so let’s fill in the gaps. Transformers and the All-Spark have to be manmade because they wouldn’t be so comfortable interacting with human machinery and resembling humans. The All-Spark, which gives life to machines, would hypothetically not be able to interact with human technology if it was made by some other alien race. It would only be able to interact with that alien race’s technology, because we can’t assume that another alien race serendipitously made circuit boards and computers in the same exact way we did.

This theory came from noticing how humanoid Transformers look. In the Michael Bay films, the Transformers are designed to resemble humans. They walk upright, have four limbs, and have working eyes/mouths that move when they talk. Functionally, there isn’t even a reason for their mouths to move. Can’t they just use speakers?! For that reason, we can assume they were made to resemble humans. Again, no other alien race would serendipitously create humanoid-looking organisms that look the exact same as we do. Just because we walk upright and have four limbs doesn’t mean any other race needs to.

In conclusion:

Humans created the All-Spark, which gave life to Transformers. The Transformers fought and utilized the All-Spark’s ability to teleport, sending everyone 4 million years into the past.

Feasibly, if an alien race created the All-Spark then it wouldn’t be able to interact with human technology, because alien technology probably doesn’t work the same at all.

Transformers are made to resemble humans because they’re manmade, otherwise they wouldn’t need to move their mouths to talk. You say, “Well that’s just some CGI magic!”. I say that’s evidence. An alien race probably wouldn’t look exactly like us, so how would they know to make Transformers look exactly like us?
Leo spitz
TheRealEffingDeal.***

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