Tonight I thought about ending it all... but I don't want to. But sometimes it feels like there is no other choice. I'm a transexual. Or at least I want

12 years

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Tonight I thought about ending it all… but I don’t want to. But sometimes it feels like there is no other choice. I’m a transexual. Or at least I want to be. I haven’t the money to pay for treatment nor do I have the education to make it. I’m almost 40 years old and I despair at ever actually being myself. I look like a fat, stupid hairy man when all I ever felt like is a girl. I’m so sad and no one seems to get it. The people who do know just say hang in there… to the people who don’t know I feel like I’m always wearing a mask. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to end it all but sometimes the desire finds me and it hurts and scares me.

New Confession

I hate that the women I want to have se.x with, you have to get to know them first and build a rapport. You can’t just say ‘Come to bed with me’ you have to talk about and do a bunch of unrelated s.hit that has nothing to do with s.ex. And even then, after all that you might not get them into bed.

Related Confessions

From “Etobicoke Life Magazine”
March 1999

“Walmart Workers Busted”

“A number of Walmart workers have been charged with theft of over $10,000….investigators used video evidence….workers removed security tags from VCRs….

Charged is J— Jasenec, age 24 and ……”

1. Etobicoke Life Magazine has been defunct since 2002, but you can research it at the Toronto Reference Library

2. This took place at the Honeydale Walmart

3. F*** YOU Sister Marie Howorth!! You had no f***** right to ask me private questions about my father’s death! The school board takes MY SIDE and even APOLOGIZED!!!

4. F*** YOU Judy W!!! F*** YOU Yvonne K!!!! Cause my mamma taught me NOT to steal! I was always an honest Bay girl! 😉

5. My father verbally abused my mother and my life was happier without him. Stop attaching everything I do to his death.

6.F*** YOU ALL in number 4 for attacking my ability on having empathy for strangers who die young or suffer. Having empathy for a stranger is not a bad thing. You think your Jesus would agree with you or me on that one?