I’ve been depressed since I was about 9 or 10, so really my childhood ended abruptly for me. Sometimes it gets better, and sometimes it gets worse. Over a decade and a half later, I still struggle with it daily and suicidal thoughts have started to come back to me again.
Truth is, I’m too fearful of what’s on the other side to ever do it. Also, I’d be much too frightened via any real method. I can’t imagine shooting myself or taking pills and waiting to slip into darkness.
Really, at that point, death scares me more than life, which I guess is a good thing? lol.
I just need my current life to SUBSTANTIALLY change and I feel like no one in my family understands, they act like I should just “be strong” and “tough it out” because I’m a guy and an adult… it freaking s****.
It especially irks me because they, too, suffer with mental illness but can’t/won’t understand mine.