since we were little my brother always let me sleep in his bed with him (he is 17 and I am 15 and male) until recently when he started getting really pissed at me and yelling at me to “f*** off” because “you’re too old for this s***”. I know he needs his space and I try to give it to him. I haven’t slept for two days. I can’t sleep without him, this is just the way it’s always been. I’m so scared now because everyone’s already telling me that he’s turning into a man and is gonna go off to college and get married to a beautiful lady and all that’s cool, really it is, I love my brother and want him to be happy, but I don’t want to lose him and I want things between us to stay the way they’ve always been. When we were little we used to say we’d marry twins because they’d understand and we could all still share a bed. He used to want to hang out with me, but now he gets embarassed when I talk to him in public/around his friends, and I know I’m just the lame kid brother but it still hurts and even when i stop talking to him in front of people, he ignores me when we’re alone and he never did that. our neighbor punched me in the face yesterday for walking across his yard and my brother hasnt even noticed it i dont think. i know this is all because of what happened over spring break, when he got close to me in bed and i thought we were spooning so i pressed back but he pulled down my boxers and rubbed spit on my inner thighs and got himself off by f****** through my legs and b*********. i made sure he knew i wasnt mad. i told him i liked it and that we could do it again or not if he wanted. we did something every night for about a week, until i got this weird cherry lube stuff from our parents bathroom and told him he could f*** me, and ever since he’s been yelling at me and pushing me away and i know i fucked up i just wish i could fix it