i have been an outcast most of my life. I used to watch the tv series the outcasts set on another planet. its so scary to think in 2012 a massive sun flare nearly wiped out the worlds electronics and Armageddon was around the corner if that happened. its a melt down on a catastrophic scale like we would end up on another planet. no electricity down fall of all the world economy and communications. I wondered what that would be like for a movie scenario or tv show like the outcasts. I am an outcast. have always been all my life. its painful scary and lonely. I see darkness without hope and so much person inner pain. I want to be a drug addict. I want to have hope and have a dream of marriage or friends, but is that just too much to expect? doom is easier to predict and expect. I want someone to teach me how to expect better and hope for better and be with me to love me and guide me to be better and think better. I need someone. i really need someone badly.