I hate you… I hate that you left me. I hate that I am not integral to anyone’s life. We are all replaceable. If I died tomorrow people would notice. People would be sad for a bit but they would carry on their lives and I would be consigned to the past tense. Perhaps that would be for the best. To die and just be the past and not ever ever face another tomorrow. Knowing that no one and nothing matters except the s*** box inside my bubble of bone. You left me. Friends abandoned me and you and those self same friends talk. You even visit my son’s grave and leave flowers. I will disappear from everyone. I will run into the night where I cannot be found ever again. There will be no more me and you can all rot. But the truth is betrayers do not suffer. They get no penalties. The people who care and love get those. Well I’m done. You can have your life without me. I will be gone and not one of these people will remember me in a few years. This is it.