I hate my life the only times I am truly happy anymore is when I am at the gym or drinking. Coaching turned into more of a stressful activity than me being able to go out and have fun doing what I love. My primary job is only that because of the paycheck, I hate the actual job other than the pay the only positives are being outside and some of the people. My weekend job I love it, but they can’t give me enough hours and by the time I go to work there I am exhausted and it loses its fun. And to do the things that make me happy I barely have the energy to work out and often times skip it because I need to get sleep. And when drinking comes around I am worried I’ll have a nervous breakdown or do something completely dumb. So nothing really makes me happy anymore and I don’t know how to tell anyone or even who to tell anymore.