I met a guy at the mental health place today, I keep wanting to find the others but I dunno how to even go about it but it figures they’d be right under my nose. He was totally on my wavelength, offered me a smoke and it was soo good, I thought it’d make me sick like the last time but I had one & nope! He mirrored back alot of what I already know and am trying to finally live and I said ‘people are so fkn stupid!’ and he just said you gotta play along and take them as they are, which of course i already knew. He’s like ‘have you seen Terminator?’ and I’m like ‘yeah i see through allll the movies. I can’t watch alot anymore’. And he was like ‘ Yeah I know the graphics mess with your head but well that’s like us, we’re the resistance, they think we’re dumb but we’re the smart ones and that’s our power.’ I was like ‘ yeah, gotta be subtle.’ All i could think was i wish this guy had been my dad, my real dad doesn’t know jack sh*t, i mean he does but he’s eaten it for so long he’s gone sorta blind like the rest. I asked for people to talk to, i hope its bringing them to me now, this is hell all alone. There was a girl online few weeks ago but she left. I feel so raw and alone. Its so amazing when your deeper mind is directing you & communicating to you (?) but I feel like there’s still so much damage/fear in the way, I hope it shows me how to heal it all. I wanna peel off all the layers. Its so nice to let it out to people who know