3 years
x
123 Views

i’ve been constantly ill for over a year and i’ve made full plans on my suicide nobody knows all though i have 0 friends and my family aren’t close my parents have always been emotionally unavailable.
im just waiting for it to bee too much on on some days it feels like it is I’ve spent so much time alone and ill I’ve made full plans on how i will end my life if things don’t improve because i really have no reason to live i have nobody and no reason , not even my health anymore now i have no future and i know once im dead it wont make any difference to anybody’s life with me not around

New Confession

I haven’t spoken to you for over a year and I haven’t messaged you for several months. I have left you alone completely and I feel it’s better that way. You may think I’m still immature but you’re wrong, very wrong! I am not your enemy and you don’t treat me well as a member of this family. You think you’re right means you never did anything wrong and you alone are punishing me for doing cruel things to a youngest brother and his wife. You like anyone else has flaws and you think you’re little miss perfect, you’re not and thinking you’re perfect, you are sincerely mistaken and truly lost. You don’t trust me with anything in your life. You’re problem is you never trusted anyone especially men in the family who are younger than you. You never trusted me not you ever trusted the youngest brother, you always put you full trust in a sister-in-law, the youngest brother’s wife. There’s always been a cardinal rule that you should never, EVER, put your full trust in an in-law and you ma’am had broken that rule and seriously offended me. I always knew you had trust issues and our late mother told me about that years ago and she pleaded with you to get help for those problems and start working hard to develop trust in everyone. It seems you don’t want to and that is rather very disappointing. Until you can change and start working hard to develop trust with the people who love you I will not make any attempts to reach out to you nor will I ask for anything from you. If you want to be the distrusting eldest sibling in this family and be bitter towards the younger siblings because of it, that’s your doing and that’s your cross to bear. You don’t trust me to this day, then I don’t trust you, either. It’s simple. Your birthday is coming up and don’t be surprised if you hear from me or not. Until then, remember what I said and if you want to talk, you know where to reach me but you have to make the first move for I won’t. I made too many and I won’t make another this time. It’s your turn and you need to make that move for yourself. And please, this is between me and you, no one else. Keep the rest of the family out of this. Take care!

Related Confessions