Realising your childhood was abusive when you’re 50 is a shock.
But actually finally understanding why I do what I do is such a huge relief.
I was pretty much starving from 14 – 16 when I left them because I was not allowed to make food for myself. I was screamed for making a mess if I went near the kitchen. Yet my father wouldn’t make me food. Mum made him lunches but not me.
I got one meal a day when mum was home to cook dinner. Usually something on toast or a potato. I had to wait until no one was home and steal crisps etc to hide to have something for school.
I remember a complete meltdown my father had because I ate one of his apples. An apple! You’d think a parent would be glad their child chose an apple.
This is why when I have food now I over eat compulsively. A learned behaviour.
Just one of the many ways these people messed me up. I only stay around now because I want my damned inheritance when it comes.
