Ok, i read what you wrote. And i want to be honest in what im saying and not come off/be disingenuous. But i also dont want to judge myself by someone elses standard or perception. I know i have feelings. I dont know if you saw anything i cant explain, or at least akcnowledge that it was weird or uncomfortable. And i dont know what you saw. I know i can be mean and careless sometimes and i dont mean to be, but its also too easy to just say that and not try to be better, i can acknowledge that. And youre right, i s*** at romance and thats sad for me. Most of the time period i had a chance i was just thinking about how i could make a really good move, and embarrassingly only came up with a s***** one.
I have to think about this for a little longer and i will write more but only if youre open to it of course. I want to give a sincere reply thats not just making excuses for myself. But i also really do struggle knowing what you are talking about. But i dont wanna gaslight you either. If you want to no longer talk i understand. In that case thank you for your help. It really did help me in my life and i could tell you really tried and cared and i deeply felt and appreciated it. If you dont believe that its understandable, in that case im sorry for not making it clearer. You really do treat it like an art and it was beautiful to witness. Im sorry for what happened or what i did. I will think about this longer, and i have thought about what you said or hinted at before.