he had a soft spot for me when we were in middle school. i’m not sure what it was and i don’t know why he was so sweet to me, telling me his secret before he told anyone else. we weren’t even friends. but i love him. it’s junior year now, and i still love him. platonically. agape. but i still love him. i wonder if he still likes me. i wonder if he loves me back. i wonder what he’s like. i want to know his inner workings. not to be quirky and stupid or anything, but he’s so different. considerate. more than anyone else at this school. i hope i’m not a fool (i don’t care if i’m a fool) and i wish that we could get to know each other without interruptions. i’d love to have a tragic story with him and me as the stars. i love him. i’m schizoid, but my feelings of compassion for him reach through? it’s weird. i miss him but i never even had him. i think.
