I went to my alma mater yesterday, 15 years post-graduation. I met my wife at that college. A lot has changed since then. Now I live in a typical suburban neighborhood – fences, minivans, backyard grills, etc…
I forgot what it’s like being in a college setting, and I missed it so much. I haven’t been this depressed in a long time. The women there – young, fresh, and, most importantly, they all seemed happy and care-free. I wanted to be like them. I wanted them to look at me as a potential date, not some middle-aged man with carseats in his minivan and a wife who doesn’t touch him anymore.
I’ve always read that suicide rates are highest for middle-aged men with families and established careers. Now I know why. What’s the point in living if the excitement is no longer there? In college, I didn’t know what the coming years would bring. Now I can tell you exactly where I will be ten, twenty, thirty years from now.
The only big mystery in my life is how I will die.