12 years
x
290 Views

I’m a wreck.

I have so much problems. First of all, last week, the day was going so smoothly and I almost thought it was going to be a good day. Then my friend just mention that this guy that I have loved for so long has a girlfriend. For the rest of the day, I was depressed. To make it even worse, I feel as if I am bisexual. I think of girls and guys both at the same time. Then I have social anxiety. I have low self esteem, zero confidence, and I also tend to scrutinize everything I do and think that I look hideous or I performed poorly in front of others. “Be strong” is easier said than done. I don’t know what to do. I f****** hate myself. I should just go and kill myself. I can’t take it any longer. My parents divorced when I was young, the guy I have loved for so long has a girlfriend, I might be bisexual and I don’t know how my parents will react to that, and on top of all that, I hate myself. You know what? I might consider self harm. Maybe not. I’m scared of taking away my own life but at the same time, I want to do something like that. I just want to let go. I want to leave this world. I want to let go.

New Confession

Related Confessions

I f****** hate you (bf) , you f****** manipulative,hypocrite, emotionally abusive, vaping, life draining, wannabe player b******. I.HATE YOU. I still deeply resent you. This is why everyone thinks you’re an a****** at your job. You’re not some anti-hero that you claimed to be. No- You’re just an a******. Point blank . Especially to me of all people! You always take it out on me, and you still wonder why I won’t touch you like that or shut down completely with you. Everytime you sense or feel even an inch that im happy, peaceful, something I enjoy doing you immediately smash that down so you can feel better and have power over me. What’s funny is that every time you’re in the wrong, overstep your boundaries, make me really upset or talk crap to me – karma smacks you right in the face everytime & you don’t even realize it. Funny how you’ve said yourself that people spit at the sky just for it to come back-yet you’ve done the exact same thing too – you’re not godlike or safe from getting karma, even I’ve dealt with karma too when I was in the wrong many times too. So no- you’re not a misunderstood dark knight turn bad like the joker you claim to be. You’re just an egotistical bigoted jerk & everyone can see that except you. I hate myself that I fell for your facade – lovebomb trap years ago . And all the times that you’ve talked crap about other’s appearances, especially women’s, karma yet again smacked you in the face & put on a ton of weight and still wonder why you haven’t lost pounds but still continue on demanding me to cook & make you even more food despite you complaining about it , hmmmm , gee I wonder why. Anyways , glad to vent that out .