My husband (boyfriend at the time) put a knife to my throat, found out I was pregnant a week later. I stayed, he raped me for most of the 20 years we’ve been together. Everyone thinks he’s great because he wanted me to stay home and not work, be with kids. 100% a way to keep me isolated and unemployable. I feel worthless at 39, I know I’m a good mom, but I have no friends, no connections, and no prospects. I’ve thrown away my life for the first man that came along because I was so love deprived, and I feel guilty for feeling this way.