Rough day. Felt lonely and used. People i cared so much for saying it would be better if i died. Cant call anyone. Cause no one gives a f***. So what if im dead? You dont miss me even when im alive.
Sometimes i live another day just to annoy such people. Ill go and put the stickers they called garbage all over their town. And I WILL show my ugly face on live concerts. I dont care what they think. I hid myself in my 20ies but why must i do that? Why hurt myself more over someones words? I am also a living being who needs joy and beauty and love, but somehow nobody sees that. You see a weirdo. But what I am is an undead, who survived more than anyone can imagine. I already had so much pain in my life. when will there be just a little bit of love and tenderness. will everyone I meet only hurt me? cant someone hug me and tell me itś ok and I will never hurt again. thats my only wish.
also, I am sorry for mentioning it. but there is one person. who is especially cruel. he pops like a ghost once a year then disappears. he told me he cared about me, but he never sees me, always has time for others. Treats me like a non human, cold, when he was warm and caring once. I loved him a lot but he is an a****** who uses people and hurts them on purpose. It was never real, he used me to get things, material things. He got revenge on his ex in the most awful way. that shocked me, I didnt think he was capable of something so cruel. He lives in Goik, Belgium. If there is anyone from Gooik here. watch out for that guy. He is around 49 and with this godawful ugly beard, has no style, just an old geezer who likes oysters and wastes his life away in bars, chasing prostitutes and bullshitting people about the friends that stood by himduring difficult moments. I dont know why we are the villains now.