Sometimes I just look out a window and realize I f****** hate myself. I can never truly enjoy something, because no matter what, I’m in a continuous lie. I’m not a girl, I’m a boy. But I can never come out. I hate myself for that. I just want to be honest, I know my family would accept me. My brother is trans. My mom accepts him more than anything. But the thought of never being able to go back after, the thought of them being disappointed is haunting. I don’t want it to happen. I want to come out, but in real life? It’s hard. I don’t know what to do.