13 years
x
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4 different guys have violated me and had their way with me despite me saying no and fighting it. Two of them straight up humiliated me intentionally and degraded me and vocalized how ugly and pathetic I was during the time that they were using me. One time I stopped fighting and just laid still and limp like a doll while he went at it. I’ve never had my first kiss, I’ve never held hands with anyone, I don’t remember what a hug feels like. The only “boyfriend” I had was this suicidal/cutting boy in 6th grade and I agreed to go out with him because I was afraid he would hurt himself more if I didn’t. I think I’ll be alone forever. Nobody wants me for me, they just want a hole to put their d*** in. I guess I’m just a piece of meat for guys, because I don’t see being with someone who respects and cares about me in the future. Maybe not even in this lifetime, I guess I deserve it.

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