Sometimes I stalk people. I will surf the internet looking for clues as to who they really are to put a detailed picture together. I think it stems from being unhappy in my marriage and for that I confess I am sorry. I am a pig I know, but eventually I will get bored and return to the responsibilities I have been neglecting. I think I get enjoyment out of seeing other people suffer too. I don’t know why but maybe it’s because deep down I feel I am not good enough for anyone or anything. Maybe if I let go of my ego that I don’t honestly think I carry although I get the sense that I am pretentious and overly fake when I communicate with friends- I can just focus on living a humble yet rewarding life. One where I lift people up because I hurt to see them hurt. I think tonight I will think critically about how much of my time I waste on others’ digital lives and use that time more constructively toward bettering my situation and my relationships with others. Sorry I have been such a jackass.
