one week ago i tried to kill myself, except i couldn’t cut deep enough. i’ve been feeling screwed up inside for almost a year now and no one in my family knows. it’s now summer in australia and im wearing long sleeves, they still havent noticed. i want to tell my mum or sister, but i just cant bring myself to do it, because i feel like the thing inside me is holding me back and pinning me to the ground. i start my sport again soon, but the cuts still havent healed into silver scars. i dont know what to do. i just want to cry all the time, but i can’t, i’m thinking about killing myself too but i promised my friend in another state that i wouldn’t, because she doesnt know what to do without me. i think i’m depressed and have anxiety issues, but i’m too afraid to go to the doctors. it’s killing me.