I have 2 older sisters who are 10 and 12 years older then me. My mum died when I was 12 so my dad took on the parental responsibilities alone. I’m 16 now.

5 years

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I have 2 older sisters who are 10 and 12 years older then me. My mum died when I was 12 so my dad took on the parental responsibilities alone. I’m 16 now. My dads and I relationship has become so bad after my mums death and it’s just him and I at home now. He earns a lot but he has to work a lot so he’s constantly on business trips so we hardly ever see or spend time with each other. We argue all the time. I appreciate everything he does and gives me but he’ll throw it back in my face whenever I do something he doesn’t like. My parents never planned to have me. My mum used to say I was a lovely surprise but my dad never said anything about it. Until one time we argued he said “I don’t even know why your mum wanted you. I didn’t. We should of just stuck with (my 2 sisters names) and never had you”. And from that moment I realised my dad only cares for me but does not love me.

New Confession

i tried nitrous for the first time last week, on his birthday. it was kind of underwhelming. i think i already have a tolerance from past ketamine abuse since it acts on the same receptors

i am thinking of doing ketamine again. i do it every few months or so now. im tired of snorting lines though and ive been thinking a lot about injecting it again. IV is like a dream, but apparently its easy to “pass out” before you can take the needle out of your arm, so im worried about taking really high doses. IM takes a little more time, but it leaves you with muscle pain for a few days wherever you shoot it up.

ive had a plate of lines sitting in my room for like a month now. itd be easiest to do those, i just hate the long 12 hour comedown when i take enough for a k hole….

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