i’m in love with a wacko. I’m tempted to run. But sure love that man. he makes me smile and laugh. I hope he can appreciate me. My wild streak. A call to be wild. Ugh. I think he is a little too tame for me. I dunno. I’m a prude in real life. shocking huh? but wow. do I ever have a wild streak. Poor guy has NO idea. I do wonder how he would be like to just kiss. mmmm….its 12:30 am. Cinderella is here. Cant help but want to touch him. not just his body. but I want to touch is heart.

I want to know him. Not just the fun. but i want to know his dark side. his…lazy. I want to know it all. He is a mess. That man is a complete and utter disaster. I dont know why i am with him. I should be dating a younger man. but i’m not. i’m with a man 13 yrs older than me. But..wow..he sure can stir my spirit.

He’s sooo calm. its scary. I often heard it said. “Still waters run deep”. and i think he is one such man. The guy would make a hell of a poker player. he would beat the hell out of anyone and everyone. he is THAT good.

the problem is I have new goals and dreams to chase. A new career path to pursue. I want to learn to be independent. I want to bring something to our lives. (if he ever gets the courage to propose with a real diamond) I wait. but i wont wait forever. I am simply THAT impatient.

I know he is scared. I think his family really screwed him up. I also think…LOVE can heal him. The question is …can MY love heal him? Give him courage. Take away his fears and anxiety. I just don’t know yet. Only God knows.

Wish me luck.