It feels like forever since we last spoke but sometimes it seems like it was only yesterday. I love you, I hate you. I miss you, I never want to see you again. You helped me with so much yet you almost wrecked everything. I am pissed at you, I am sad that you and I will never be together but yet happy and great flu that we didn’t cuz it might have been the worst mistake of my life. I hate that she has you and I don’t. I hate that you have your instant family and I have very few people in my life. I bet she doesn’t know the real you. Your kinks, your mistakes. How when you were supposed to be working on your marriage you were watching p***, writing p***, cybering and having s** IRL. Then she caught you and dropped you. You went from one s** partner your entire 46 years of life to half a dozen. I was young, newly married confused and dumb. What was your excuse? Now my life is with a man who I love but who won’t love me physically. Though I know he loves me, sometimes I just want to die. But still it’s better than being with you
