I was abused so much as a child that I now go out looking for adrenaline, not in the usual ways that you get it, EG, skydiving, running, ect.. but I mess

6 years

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I was abused so much as a child that I now go out looking for adrenaline, not in the usual ways that you get it, EG, skydiving, running, ect.. but I mess with the police, I always prank call them, do stupid things, I just don’t know what it is, I’m so used to being abused so much that nothing feels real anymore, I recently got a criminal record and I can tell that my life will be coming to a standstill soon, I am in a lockdown facility where I can’t even leave this place without two workers watching everything I’m doing I’m so badly wanting to just take off but I can’t.. my window is bolted in, the front door can’t even be unlocked without a fob key.
I need to get away but I don’t know how I am meant to do this?
I Cant do this anymore, I am blank theres nothing more that I find interesting.

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Sorry about your d1ck b1tch

Tread Dickless aka D*** treadless

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My wife knew i was a recovering s** addict when we dated, when we married, and knew that it stemmed from childhood maternal molestation many years ago. She knows i will not act out, that i love her too much to do that to her, and she knows to the degree any non s** addict can how exhausting the onslaught of compulsive intrusive s***** thoughts are. But she still rejects my sincere well motivated desire for surgical or chemical castration and i cannot understand why. We have a platonic relationship so it would be zero loss to either of us.