Yeah I know the feeling…

I think your only solution, is to forget everything and everyome from the past. The past is obviously dead or tainted for you. People see you a certain way, and because of that, you can’t be around them with confidence that its real. Its ruined.

Your only solution really is to forget it, do new things, find new people and change the way you approach them. Learn from your lessons so that people see you the way you want them to see you, while keeping it real at the same time. Dont fake anything. Be yourself.

Personally I have an entire list of things I need to do that will benefit me and truly make me much better off.

If your past or your life is contaminateed with people who see you in a negative light, or less than reality, less than you need or not in a way that you want them too, maybe they got you wrong, even deliberatly possibly dragging you down to a level you are not, some people do that, you ARE better than they are, you always were, they need to drag you down sometimes even covertly for one reason or another, maybe they want what you have, you need wipe the board clean, don’t look back, try to be a better person and a better person for yourself. Learn to like yourself if you dont, better yourself, find better people and dont f*** it up the way you have. Some times its not even your fault, maybe you know a few toxic or jealous, envious people like I just mentioned who completely ruined and fucked up your life going where they dont belong, because its good and they would never find that on their own, thats the way it goes sometimes. Let em have it, cut it all loose, Learn from it. Thats all you can do about it

Something simple I want to do among many other things is maybe ckean myself up a bit. Go buy some nice clothes, and do that more often too on a regular basis, sometbing other than work clothes, get some style back into myself, and start dating and doing more. I also have quite a few bigger fish to fry that I am very capable of pulling off with little effort, but number one is to be much more physically attractive, and active. Actually I thnk I’m pulling an all nighter to working on a few of those tonight

Dont ever give someone who ever fucked you over or treated you like a fool or a p************ the time of day again. For anything, because they do and will want it regardless of what they label you as. Thats a lie.