Well I am in lge with you too but that doesnt mean anything and it never did, but what if you telling me, and me believing it is the differemce between me swallowing my feelings and letting it be, because Ive been led on and fucked over pretty badly at times and gotten nothing for it in the end. I think you know that too. I dont know who or what to believe or if it means anything.

What if I actually always believed you were in love with me all these years? Maybe I know anyway. How could you not be in love with me? Not to be conceipted, you knew I adored you to no end. I loved you so much. You’re the sweetest thng I ever knew. I never got much out of you back then but years later, I understood. Maybe it wasn’t in vain up until that point.

It hard for me to believe that now, though.

Im not perfect. Im older, but I’m told Im still pretty alright. Im not expecting perfection either, and its not all about that anyway when you love, but if you happen to be insecure about things, I am too, who isn’t, actually Im not I like myself but we need to love ourselves too. If you needed it I would be willing to help you or support you to work on things that you dont feel great about so you do love yourself more and in turn can love me more. You could inspire me to work on a few things myself like quitting bad habbits like cigarettes and that kind of thing too.

I say “I dont drink” and I don’t, I dont drink alone, I dont come home from work and crack a beer, I have seen a lot of bad s*** as a result of alcohol, but you know what? I am not against it. If you like to drink wine or whatever, well Ive been good when it comes to that my whole life, I have never had a problem with it, I am willing to have some fun with you that way too every so often. Every weekend if that’s what it is.

I need to hear it though. I would believe you and you know its mutual, just from what I remember and say. Come on. It never left really. My hope came and went at times, maybe there were times you were far in the back of my mind I assumed with what a gorgeous girl you were, somebody snatched you up like nothing, but it never left.